Days 1 and 2 - Oslo 14 & 15 September 2023

Up at sparrow’s - taxi to BSI - Skybus to Airport - 2.5 hour flight to Oslo - cramped seats but we slept for most of it. - no passport control as we must be in the Schengen. Train to Oslo Sentral - Walked on cobblestone main pedestrian drag to Bob W - about 10 minutes walk.

Bob W. is a new way to stay for us. No reception. Code for front door, swipe app for room door. It’s a cross between a boutique hotel and a hostel, but everything is contained to your room, with the laundry the only communal shared space. It’s also carbon neutral, provides chargers, yoga mats, drink bottles etc. Very new, very cool, very millennial. You’d be fucked if you didn’t have a phone - but then travelling in general would be impossible without it.

We then had a quick look around our berg. First impressions were pretty impressive. The locals are very good-looking and seem confident and affluent. They are well dressed, well groomed and slightly conservative looking.

The town looks like any other European capital city - cathedrals, trams, cobblestones, bars, lots of business people, homeless, convenience stores, chain brands, etc…

I bought some beers from the Vinmonopolet - which is the state-owned bottlo. We had a few drinks in the room, got some sushi for dinner and then I had a whiskey nightcap in an Irish pub (The Irish Drover) and watched France demolish Uruguay in the Rugby World Cup on the TV. I saw heaps of dudes in Blink 182 shirts and discovered the next day that they played in Oslo that night!! Far out. It was also the start of a 3 day Scandinavian Music Festival called By-larm, but we didn’t know any of the acts, so we didn’t check it out.

Massive walking day - 18,000 steps before I crashed.

Day 2 saw me awake with a sore back, sore feet and a sore head. I elected to skip the walking tour and agreed to meet Jen-Jen at the end of it in front of the Parliament building.

Jen learnt a lot about Oslo and Norway and learnt that traditionally red houses were for the poor, yellow for the working class and white for the aristocracy. The current monarchy lives in a yellow house because they are in touch with the common man and are much loved.

Our feet were still sore and we decided to hire bikes to cut around the city on. We rode to the funky Vigeland Park and saw heaps of sculptures by this dude. Check the pics and vids - way cool. We had bakery treats and coffee for lunch. The bakeries in Norway are sensational and their lunch rolls are nutritious and delicious - however, they were nearly as expensive as Iceland. Not to worry, I can take up prostitution if I’m super broke…

We had a chilled arvo before we got bikes again and rode to the harbour. On Jen’s tour she discovered that tonight was Oslo Cultural night and that most things - including the museum were free after 5pm.

We biked down to the harbour in the light rain and after watching a choir we were into the museum. We saw a few rando rooms and paintings before we saw the main attraction - Evard Munch’s “The Scream.” It was pretty bizarre to see such a famous piece of art in the flesh, but here it was. We also saw a lot of the Queen’s dresses and lots of modern art.

Between the sculptures in the park and the art in here I reckon I’ve seen 50 cocks today… classic.

We then went to an Italian place on the Harbour called Olivia’s for dinner. We had calamari, focaccia and aioli for starters before we shared a capricciosa pizza for dinner. Jen had a few wines - I was on the waters - before a choccie souffle for dessert. It was delicious and yep, I’m gonna have to start selling my body to finance the rest of the trip.

At least I know they dig cocks in Oslo.

We then crashed for our morning train to Flam and then Bergen. A wee taste of Oslo, but a charming, world-class city.

Thanks.